Dreams Preamble: I Have Suffered Thesis

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In "The Interpretation of Dreams," Sigmund Freud also referred to anxiety dreams. My dream is clearly an anxiety dream that points to an underlying phobia: my fear of illness and death. Freud also argues that most anxiety has its roots in sexual tension and repressed sexual desires. In "The Interpretation of Dreams," Freud claims, "neurotic anxiety derives from sexual life, and is the expression of unsatisfied desire which has been diverted from its goal." Therefore, Freud would seek for sexual symbols in my dream. Being in a hospital and receiving surgery does not seem like sexual symbolism. However, Freud looked beyond the manifest content of the dream to discover underlying sexual imagery. In my dream, being cut open symbolizes the vagina. A crystal in my body is like a phallus. Surgical implements are also phallic symbols. The doctors are paternal figures, signifying the Oedipus or Electra complexes that explain repressed anxiety stemming from parental relationships and sexual desire. Furthermore, the blood spilling forth from my stomach symbolizes menstruation. Lying down on a bed during the duration of the dream also serves as a sexual symbol. My losing consciousness at the end of the dream can be likened to having an orgasm. In that sense also, Freud might attribute my loss of consciousness on the operating table to what he referred to as the death wish.

The id, ego, and superego are all present in my dream. The doctors and other hospital staff represent the superego: the overarching logical forces of society.

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They stood over me during the dream, and I was prone and submissive to them. My being at the mercy of the hospital staff symbolizes the taming of my ego in being willing to listen to the wise advice of the doctors (the superego). My id is the force that is least present in this dream, as there is little driving me toward pleasure.

Much of the dream represents a loss of control over my body: which is how I felt during the day. Without any diagnosis for my stomach problems, I feel like I have no control over my body. No cure has ever been offered to me, and therefore my deepest desire would be for doctors to be able to miraculously cure me. The dream is the fulfillment of that wish on a psychic level. I dreamt that doctors were able to instantly remove the source of my stomach problems. The source of those problems in the dream was a crystal. As a phallic symbol, the crystal might symbolize some kind of sexual trauma from my past that is causing me to experience so much physical pain. If I were in psychotherapy with Freud, the doctor might ask me whether I had experienced sexual abuse. Being cut open against my will and without me knowing is like being raped, and therefore Freud would probe my memories for any such traumatic experience that could be the latent content of my dream......

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