Gender-Based Differences in Communication Styles Essay

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In intimate relationships, men still communicate through the same direct methods but they have tremendous difficulty expressing more personal thoughts and feelings to their partners. They may throw themselves into work to support their families as an expression of their love but they have a much harder time expressing their love verbally. Meanwhile, women tend to rely on the same metamessages such as by communicating their feelings and needs to men through a wider range of communication strategies many of which are lost on men.

This can cause significant problems in intimate relationships because from the woman's perspective, she has been trying to communicate her thoughts and needs. Eventually, she can become hurt, angry, and resentful, because she interprets his ignorance as a rejection rather than realizing that he genuinely does not understand what she has been trying to communicate.

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The man may also become frustrated because from his perspective, he may be working very hard to take care of his family and that he is doing what men are supposed to do.

There is a real irony to the difficulty that men and woman often have in communicating. On one hand, men use verbal language and communicate very directly, provided they are discussing relatively impersonal issues. Women rely much less on direct verbal communications because they use a broader range of communications methods, but they are much more comfortable communicating intimate thoughts, feelings, desires, and needs than men. Ultimately, this is one of the main reasons that men and women sometimes experience difficulty in their intimate relationships.

Reference

Deborah Tannen. "Talk in the Intimate Relationship: His and Hers".....

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