Advice From My Father: Live Essay

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My father pointed out how many ways "group think" is evident in common social rituals such as social drinking, especially in college-age students. We discussed the phenomenon of drinking games like "quarters" and "beer pong," in particular, the fact that the enjoyment of drinking should make it a reward of winning a round, but that most drinking games are backwards. He explained that, again, there is nothing wrong with the decision to drink responsibly under appropriate social circumstances, but that the issue had to do with the ways that people, especially at my age, tend to drink in patterns where the individual is "encouraged" by various forms of social pressure to drink more than he or she would without that pressure. I recognized the accuracy of his characterizations when I thought about how often I had experienced situations where people who tended to drink more than others exerted social pressure on everyone else to drink more (or faster), such as by comments associating the quantity of alcohol consumed with "achievement" and the opposite as a "failure" justifying ridicule.

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Ironically, according to my father, the people whose external behavior shouts the message "I don't care what anybody else thinks" are usually the very ones most obsessed with their social image. Often, they purposely dress and act in ways that draw attention to themselves and all the ways they "don't care what anybody thinks." In that respect, blasting music from a car, for example, only illustrates that you don't care about being considerate to other people, but the very act of purposeful displays betrays their claim.

My father summed up his advice with the suggestion that I always consider what my honest motivation is for my choices in life, even when there is nothing necessarily objectionable about the specific choices in and of….....

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