Amy Tan's Two Kinds Two Essay

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I never really listened to what I was playing. I daydreamed about being somewhere else, about being someone else" (2). Naturally, her poor practice leads to a poor performance in front of her family and peers.

Here however, her reactions betray her. Tan reveals that Jing-mei values her mother's acceptance of her above anything. When Jing-mei laments that her "mother's expression was what devastated [her]: a quiet, blank look that said she had lost everything" and "No accusations, No blame. And in a way, [she] felt disappointed" (3), it becomes clear that Jing-mei's rebellions have been a function of her need for mother's acceptance and approval.

Jing-mei needed her mother to express some form of emotion towards her. Even anger or hostility equates to emotion, which in turn equates to love. Jing-mei does not express devastation over her embarrassing performance or the snide remarks by the little boy or her cousin. Rather, her desire to rebel and her need for acceptance for her mother have intersected and not receiving the acceptance was devastating to her.

After the talent show, Jing-mei again rebelled by refusing to continue her piano lessons. After her and her mother had a battle of wills, Jing-mei believed she had won the battle by proclaiming that she wished she were dead, like her mother's first two children. Her mother was shocked into silence, which Jing-mei took as a victory: "It was as if I had said magic words. Alakazam!-her face went blank, her mouth closed, her arms went slack, and she backed out of the room, stunned…" (3).

Jing-mei and her mother never resolved this conflict, rather they both dropped it permanently. And while Jing-mei refers to that exchange years later as her ultimate betrayal of her mother, she says the more frightening questions in her head was "Why had her mother given up hope" (4)? The notion that her mother would not continuously harass and nag her to be someone she was not or could not, was seen by Jing-mei as the ultimate sign that she had not won or earned her mother's acceptance or approval.

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Professor Lilia Melani of Brooklyn College (CUNY) also identifies the apparent discrepancy between how Jing-mei believes she feels and how she actually feels. Melani states that disconnect between Jing-mei and her mothers can be explained by the communication failure which develops as a result of high-context culture mixing with low-context culture. In other words, the mother, being born in China, is used to high-context where "individual acquires cultural information and meaning from obedience to authority, through observation and by imitation" (Melani). Jing-mei's low-context up bringing in the U.S. promotes rampant misunderstandings and miscommunications between mothers and daughters (Melani).

While it is evident at the end of the story that Jing-mei and her mother each cared a great deal for the other, they are never able to bridge their communication gap. So even though the two did eventually grow closer and put aside their apparent differences, they never really seem to attain the real closeness they both desired. This sentiment is symbolized by Jing-mei's mother giving her the piano and announcing that it was always hers and the she is the only one who can play it (Tan 4).

This fact further reinforces the likelihood that Jing-mei had no real desire to rebel, but used that as her mechanism to try to foster a real intimacy between herself and her mother. Each action of rebellion was accompanied by Tan's explanation of how the rebelling was a means (in Jing-mei's belief) of bring her mother's approval. Jing-mei's mother, being of high-context, did not think it was necessary or proper to expressly state her approval and acceptance of Jing-mei. Jing-mei was convinced that her mother's love was based on her achievements.

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