Cheating Both Men and Women, Consciously or Term Paper

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Cheating

Both men and women, consciously or subconsciously, dream of connecting with a soul mate. Or, in other words, the archetypical dream is of an intimate relationship where each partner feels complete in the presence of the other. In fact, it could even be argued that it is this hope that leads to the expectation of mental and sexual fidelity from one's partner. Viewed from this perspective, I agree with Stephen O. Watters's contention that cybersex can be just as damaging to a relationship as a live affair because it runs the risk of diverting one partner's mental and sexual attention away from his or her mate, resulting in unfulfilled needs and discontent.

While it is true that sexual excitement and desire soon fade from a long standing relationship, the fact remains, that sexual fidelity is important in protecting an existing relationship. This is because there is ground to believe that casual sexual encounters can escalate, leading to emotional intimacy with another person or a continued desire for varied sexual excitement.

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Either which way, it can end up diverting one partner's sexual and mental focus away from the other, thereby causing a distance in the relationship and needs going unfulfilled. Indeed, this is the nub of Watters's argument, which he supports through the opinion of psychologists and relationship experts. For example, he quotes Dr. Shirley Glass, a Baltimore-based psychologist: "[Online relationships] can threaten marriages, even if there is no sex involved .... Such online liaisons involve the three elements of an emotional affair: secrecy, intimacy, and sexual chemistry." (p. 206)

It is often said that men are from Mars, while women are from Venus. This popular adage is usually used to connote that men and women seek very different need fulfillments from relationships. Indeed, Watters addresses this point when he quotes psychologist Dr. James Dobson's point that "women often give sex to get intimacy ... And men give intimacy to get sex." (p. 205) Watters, of course,….....

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