Memory Meets Maturity in "My Essay

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It is an odd closeness he experiences with his father. In "Those Winter Sundays," we find a more definite appreciation for the father in the poem. The adult can look back and see how his father and know he was not punishing him but merely looking out for the family. The speaker asks, "What did I know, what did I know" (Hayden 14) realizing his ingratitude is worse than what his father made him do. Interestingly, it is what happened on those cold mornings that made the speaker feel a warmth and affection toward his father. Through personal experience, each poem focuses on life, responsibilities and affection.

These poems demonstrate how memories do not need to be good to be significant or meaningful. Both speakers are remembering moments of anxiety shared with their fathers and it is because they shared them with their fathers that make the memories worth remembering and sharing. In their own way, these poems illustrate the very essence of life because they accept the good along with the bad. As young boys, each speaker had difficulty with this concept, as children often will. Both boys might have felt neglected by their fathers but, in their own ways, each father was giving his son the best of his attention. They are poignant without being too sensitive. They explore how love is expressed in a variety of ways. While many may not perceive "My Papa's Waltz" to be a sentimental poem, it does define affection. The boy's father was expressing affection and the adult son remembers moments like these fondly. The fact that the speaker calls the poem his "papa's" waltz indicates his sentimentality.

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While the experience might not have been great for him, it becomes significant over time. His father, his repeated waltzes, his mother's frown are all vibrant memories that reveal the story of a young boy whose father liked to drink too much. In "Those Winter Sundays," we see the same type of remembrance. Angst turned to appreciation as the boy becomes an adult. He realizes his bemoaning on Sundays mornings caused him to miss out on the fact that his father's labor of love went unappreciated. The meaning of these poems lies not so much in their subject matter but the emotion they elicit. These poems illustrate how subtle gestures can express affection.

"My Papa's Waltz," and "Those Winter Sundays" tell the story of memory. They demonstrate how memory changes as we grow older. The tone of each poem is somber and poignant. From a father's drunken dance to another father's seemingly heartless expectation, we see how reflection reveals something more. Through rich imagery, each poem grasps the subtle nature of affection. We are drawn into each poem through the speaker's story and the realistic nature of it. We can see these fathers and we can believe they were real. The tone of these poems allows this believability to occur. They are not melodramatic nor or they so emotional that we begin to question their authenticity. They paint portraits we see and feel and through them we recognize affection is an individual thing and many times it is expressed through simple acts.

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